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Paul Walsh · 11-06-2007, 10:59 AM

Hello.
This is the first portrait I posted for a critique. I would like advice on how my work fairs? I had to reference photographs, due to time.

This is an 24" x 30" oil on canvas.

Any advice will be appreciated.

Enzie Shahmiri · 11-06-2007, 11:22 AM

Hi Paul,

I love the colors, they harmonize really well and are very suitable for this older gentleman. The only thing that I notice without having a reference photo to compare with, would be that his hair looks a bit flat.
I would recommend adding a few darker greys to give the hair more definition.

But then again, you might have already done this and I just don't see it on my monitior.

Paul Walsh · 11-06-2007, 11:25 AM

Sorry I attached both photos. Here is just one.

Paul Walsh · 11-06-2007, 11:29 AM

Hello Enzie,
Ok, I will. Now that I look at it, it does seem flat.

Thank you.

Mischa Milosevic · 11-06-2007, 06:10 PM

Paul, hello, this is looking real good. You have done a excellent job on much of the painting.

I dare not suggest changing the hair being that with the surrounding values the hair looks fine. Besides the gents hare mite be just that shade and with direct light hitting it the values do bleach out any definition of shape. Than gain Enzie mite be correct and she does make a good point.

The over all scene presents that this man is on location and there is a fire in front of him by the gesture of the pose. If this is so then it mite make the painting more interesting if the front part of the painting had more of the reddish burnt umber value and less of the smoky. Maybe a hint of red and yellow as well. This mite create space as well.

What concerns me most is the size of the head in comparison to the body. Being that he is or was a fireman he is a big guy at least his head gives that impression. I think, mind you this is just a observation, that you consider adding bit more shoulder and some waist. I think the correct word is girth?

I hope I was able to help.

All the best

Paul Walsh · 11-07-2007, 12:10 PM

Mischa,
Thanks for the input. Yes, you may be right on the size. I know using photographs as a reference can make proportions look off. I will make some adjustment to his size. I'm going to add some red, orange and a touch of burnt umber and see. When I'm done, I will post another photo.

Thanks again Mischa!

Paul Walsh · 11-07-2007, 10:15 PM

I made some changes, Increase body size and added some background color.

Mischa Milosevic · 11-08-2007, 02:44 AM

Paul, I think the changes look good. The mans shoulder are almost facing us so should can be a touch bigger plus the length of space from shoulder to elbow needs attention. On the same side the jacket below the elbow can go out more.

all the best

Paul Walsh · 11-08-2007, 08:08 AM

Mischa,
Yes, now I look at it, his right elbow does look small. I think I didn't want to go off the canvas on that. I will make the changes and post again. I really appreciate your input.

Thanks

Paul Walsh · 11-08-2007, 11:00 PM

I made adjustment to his left shoulder and made his right arm slightly bigger. Thanks again!