Dean,
You have a good sense of form and drawing, but my concearn is with the color. Warm light with warm shadows makes the face seem "hot" or overly sunned. Always think of color as relational-warm light/cool shadows, cool light/warm shadows.
Also, vary your edges along the profile. Where the form turns more gradually (such as the forehead), make the edge softer. This will give the head more depth.
Overall, I like what you are doing with the picture. I like the dark background and the profile pose. Good job!
Kyle
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