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Hi Susan,
I like your photo, and think it should work just fine.
Before you go any further with your painting, though, I think you need to look very carefully at the drawing and proportions. I find it helps to put painting and photo next to each other on the computer. I need all the extra ways of seeing things with a fresh eye that I can, so am suggesting that, as well as putting an overlay of the photo over the painting as a way of checking things out.
Image this little girl's head as a cube, with the face portion of that cube facing towards the light. Right now parts of the lower face extend below that basic cube. Does that analogy help?
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