Marisa

[Eileen Claire]

I would appreciate your critique of this 9 x 12 oil painting. Thank you!

[Chris Saper]

Eileen,

I really like what you have going on here! Your values are so subtle and effective. I am also engaged by the eyes

[Alexandra Tyng]

Eileen,

I really like the sensitive way you have portrayed this girl. Your brushstrokes and colors support your concept very well, I think.

I agree with Chris that the light in the hair stops rather abruptly.

The skin in the light seems too pale and too flat. I would expect to see more color with some cooler highlights, just to give it more roundness in this area.

Actually (sorry Chris) the eyes are giving me trouble. Maybe it's my eyes, I don't know! But the eye on our right seems to be looking directly at the viewer, while the eye on our left has an ever-so-slight cast to the (our) right.

[Eileen Claire]

Chris and Alexandra,

Thank you so much for your critiques. I will work on the things that you have both pointed out.

This is how I check the gaze direction - I cover one eye on the painting and move to different angles to spot the direction of the uncovered eye. If the gaze follows me no matter what position I take, then I know I have the gaze looking at the viewer. I then do the same with the other eye.

In this case, it appears to me that both eyes look slightly to the viewer's right. But if that is not what you are seeing, Alexandra, then I wonder what I might do to correct this.

Is there a better way to check gaze direction than the one I mentioned?

[Garth Parker]

What a lovely portrait Eileen,
I like how you handled the eyes and mouth (the mouth has that kid look ).

The background and the neck would be my nit. Possibly different hue

[Alexandra Tyng]

Hi Eileen,

About the eyes, I don't know if there's any one way to check. I simply cover one eye at a time and stare into the other one to see if it is looking directly at me. If your way works for you, then by all means stick to it. The difference in direction I'm noticing is very small, and honestly someone else might disagree with me--as has already happened! So if they look right to you, that's the main thing.

[Pat Graham]

I'm observing the same thing that Alexandra is. The eye on the viewer's left seems to be looking ever so slightly to the right, but the right eye is looking straight ahead. I think that the way to deal with this problem in this painting is to round out the left side of that iris (just a tiny bit.) To me it seems to not be totally round in shape. Does anyone else notice that, too? Hmmmm.

Pat

[Mischa Milosevic]

Eileen, you have a lovely subject. Her gaze and the shape of her face simply speak to you 'look this way'. Just lovely!

As for the critique. There are a number of things that can be considered. First, the over all big shapes look good. I would double-check some distance like the space between upper lip and nose and the space between the nose and bottom of chin and between lip line and bottom of chin. Her chin seems a tad to small.

The hair does not look natural it gives the impression of stringiness spaghetti like all over. Remember hair is soft, big shapes and light accents.

The eyes, being that you are working from a photo there are dark areas that are black when one is looking at the actual model one can observe variations of shadow value. First your highlights within the eye are what are not placed correctly and are sending wrong direction signals. Eliminate these reshape pupils and correctly place highlight within the pupil.

One more thing, I would look at the area below the chin, the neck. The way it is painted it clashes with the face and it seem a bit flat. While there I would indicate better dimention to the sweater.

I hope I was able to help.
Best wishes,
mischa

[Eileen Claire]

Thank you all so much for taking the time to critique this work.

This was actually my first oil painting. Your critiques and comments have been very helpful, and I will certainly be able to use them for this and future work.

I appreciate your help!