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Overall the drawing -- by which I mean line, shape, and measurement -- "looks" reasonably accurate and I suspect, without having seen the portrait subject or the photograph, that this is a pretty fair likeness. You've done something with the straight-on gaze of the subject that is difficult to accomplish, which is to have both eyes correctly focused on a single point. Even the slightest misplacement of an iris or pupil in such a composition can be troublesome. The size of the head -- more specifically in this mode of dress, the face -- seems appropriate within the format, and I think you made the right decision to let the top of the head garment (I'm sure it has a name, I'm sorry I don't know it) run "out" of the painting -- it would be awkward to have it just touching the edge, and to push it lower yet would, I think, move the face down too far in the composition.
The single greatest difficulty you're working against is the lighting. Before I read the text accompanying the attachment, I knew the drawing was done from a photograph, and I suspect it's either a flash photo or was taken under a very strong light located in front of the subject. Notwithstanding the highlight in the eyes suggesting an upper left light source, everything else says "flash" -- the shadow cast directly onto the cheeks by the lower glasses frame, the absence of any cast shadow from the bows of the glasses, the equally sized shadows on the neck alongside the garment, shadow on both sides of the nose, the uniform crescent of shadow under the chin and jaw line, the same intensity and uniformity of lighting in the white headpiece on both sides, and so on. The consequence of this strong face-on lighting is that it has eliminated a great deal of shape and subtlety, from shadow areas to nuances in hue that would suggest form -- roundness and depth and volume. It has introduced very large areas of rather uniformly lighted, rather white-chalky shapes on the face. (Squint down until you can see those light shapes in their overall effect, which is somewhat mask-like. We would expect those shapes to change in hue and temperature as their planes turn away from the light source.) It has removed from the garments the kind of shadow shapes that would suggest the "draped" effect of creases and folds.
I realize it sounds like a catalog of "faults" but remember, I'm talking about only one dynamic -- the lighting -- which nonetheless is of paramount interest because that's really all we can paint, is light. Experiment with some kind of side lighting. Move it in close for sharp shadow shapes, farther away for softer edges. Shoot a series of digital images (since you have access to the camera) and study the effects of the various lightings. Compare the relative strength of the light effects, as well; ask: is the light on the eyelids more or less bright than on the cheek, and is the top of the cheek as bright or less so than, say, the area between the nose and lips or below the corners of the mouth.
Two or three last minor observations. The "wing" of the nose on the viewer's left is fairly larger than the other; by way of reference, the edge of the left lines up with the edge of the pupil in the eye above it, whereas the right edge is close to the inside corner of the eye. (Yes, a rough reference, I know, but a place to start.) A lighting consideration again, the light on the underside of both "wings" is much too bright. Lastly, in less harsh light, I believe you'll usually find a different in value and temperature between the upper and lower lips. (I'll let you decide why, or if that's true.)
Hope that's the "punch" you were asking for. Work with the lighting and pay close attention to the subtle relations between color in the various areas of the piece, and I'm sure you'll quickly make satisfyingly great strides.
Steven
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Hi all
Linear Mode
