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Alicia, I've seen your photographs and they're stunning.
I'm wondering if it's necessary AT ALL to show the client reference photographs. Why not show them reference drawings/thumbnails if they are going to be part of the decision-making process (regarding pose, color-schemes, etc.)?
Granted, I'm just starting out in this business, but I will say I haven't had to face this issue because the client never sees my reference photos. I don't show up at meetings with a stack of reference photos -- I show up with charcoal gesture drawings, some more tonally developed, and typically a couple of quick oil studies to show color schemes. By this time I've worked through issues with the image, and the client has always gone with my decision. More importantly, they're excited to see how the piece evolves. (Not to say I won't have tough ones coming up.)
If you let them see the photos, you're sort of presenting yourself as a portrait photographer. And the painting better be a replica of the photo that the client has chosen to fall in love with. As painters, we're not attempting a "photocopy" of one medium to the other (pixels to paint), so don't allow your client the opportunity to think that's what you do.
I suspect most of the pros on this site work this way. Anyone?
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