[Tom Edgerton]

Happens to everyone.

If I have a potential client that wants me to unrealistically flatter them, I tell them I'm probably not the artist for them. I reassure potential clients, however, that I'm not at all averse to showing them in a favorable light.

If a possible client is really insistent that I "improve" them or someone else, I respectfully decline the commission. It's too slippery a slope, especially when this is being requested by a party other than your subject--a colleague, spouse, parent, etc. Besides, unless you are exceptionally clairvoyant, they may not like your "improvements" either.

When beginning the sittings, I ask the subject how they want to be perceived by those viewing the portrait: "What do you want the viewer to know about you (or Uncle George or whomever) when they look at this portrait." This helps identify their hopes and desires for the project. I then, like Chris, ask them, "Is there anything about your face that you don't like or are concerned about." This identifies possible areas in which to apply some expertise or care, in the manner that Sharon describes.

If they request reasonable changes--that you can agree to without sacrificing your integrity--make them with an attitude that will leave them feeling alright about having worked with you.

Don't take the projects you don't feel right about, unless there is a heavy bill in your mailbox that can't be dodged.

Best--TE