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Personally, I would find the two different lighting situations bothersome if they are hung side by side. Is the older one easier to work with? I like the lighting best on the younger one's portrait. Maybe if you are working with the older one and alone, without the rest of the family around, that might help. They could be off at the other end of the house or outside doing something non-distracting.
When I worked with Robert Schoeller, I always groved in the parents that it was best if they were not visible in the area during the photo sessions. Children very often act differently when their parents and/or siblings are around.
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