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Agreed, with but one last entry on this thread for me. On his far right side of the face (our left), you're keeping the light value right out to the very edge. Let there be some darkening of value along that edge as the form rounds away from us. Do it rather selectively (not as an even "stripe"), as you would let a line appear and disappear as appropriate to define form. In a couple of places, your value might even approach that of the background -- that is, the edge will disappear. Right now, the edge is a little hard, the value contrast just a bit too much, all of which is attracting our attention away from the expressive facial features in the center.
Work this all the way down around to the centerline of the chin. (I have a sense that the chin is skewed over to our left just a tad, and I think this edge-value work will bring it back.) Think "round", rather than cut-out. (I just returned from a Matisse exhibition here in Taipei, so I'm thinking in terms of colored paper cut-outs.)
Put your feet up for a few hours, and get started on the next thing.
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