Eve's Alternative
 

oil, on ABS, 18x24"

I think I am done and am fairly happy with it. There is one area I would like to change, but I can't seem to get it right. I wont say where and see if you all notice or maybe it isnt noticable and I can relax.

Again - since getting my new camera the photo is not what it should be. The cheapie camera seemed better for photographing my art for some reason. I'd say the real thing is clearer than this - especially the closeups. The contrast may be a bit high on screen as well. Some subtle value changes are lost.

Thank you for all the help/suggestions in WIP. Julie I meant to thank you for telling me I had the eye-path right.

This is the most planned and thought-out image design-wise I have done. I tried to think of everything - color, eye-path, placement on the ground, etc. I am hoping it makes a difference for me - all this anal planning. I cant tell yet - I like the painting, but I always like a painting when I am finished. When it isnt any good it takes me awhile to decide I hate it.

The apples and oranges and much more vivid than shown here, but the intensity of the wrap on her head is right on on my screen. Weird. Also - there is a bit more room on each side of the painting that I had to crop because it wasnt exactly straight.

Nice!
 

Kim,

This has turned out lovely. I would be happy with it as is.

Do we get to guess what the "bad" part is? Does the winner get a prize?

About the only think I see that could bother me might be that shoulder on our right (her left) that has become a dark isolated shape because the drapery has cut it off from the rest of the body.

Hi Kim--
This is really beautiful already!
This wouldn't have jumped out at me except for your comments, so I was looking for something 'off'. . . The one thing that struck me is the small bit of green apple showing between the 2 red in front of her left wrist. The top edge of that apple is relatively flat and parallel with the top edge of her wrist.... it made the wrist read a little funny to me in the full image shot,.. almost as if that green apple was part of her arm. Although it was clearer in the closeup what was going on, perhaps a little more curve to the edge of the apple would help to distinguish it from the arm?

p.s. love how you handled the hand with the orange!

Though I know that this is the critique section I will start with saying that your color harmony is fine ;)

About what could possibly be wrong, I would suggest that the lower background shows (at least on my pc) a little dark, so we don

Kim,

There is something about her left hand that bothers me. I don't like the way the apple cuts off the view of the hand. Other than that, I like it very much. My monitor may be off color wise, but it looks very dark on my screen.
Alicia

Kimberly,

When one is skillful and filled with ideas, we are tempted to GET ON WITH IT and show the world just how wonderful WE ARE! Heavens!

Here comes the dreaded lecture. Color, composition and drawing skills are equally important considerations. Every artist seems to have a dominant ability, yours and mine are probably skillfulness. I had to really struggle with composition. Color forget about it, I was clueless. There are still some highly regarded artists out there today who have absolutely no sense of color. I doubt if their popularity will last beyond their lives, if that.

I had to really work at both color and design. After a while, and a great deal of effort, things came together more spontaneously and I feel that I can try subjects, designs and ideas that were once beyond my reach.

One of the things I do before any large work is to do a quick 2 hour color study. It saves hours of time and revisions.

That said, on to your picture. I feel the figure and face is beautifully handled, toning down the lower part really helped with establishing a focal point. I do agree with Allan that a little more light on the right hand side would re-emphasize the lovely swing of her hips. The line on the arm on the right hand side is too strong, my eye goes to that, it needs to be softened. I do feel that the turban and the bright apples are competing too strongly for your attention. Both are the same value or brightness and are forcing my eyes back and forth. I think Chris Saper mentioned desaturating it, but then again it is a lovely color against the background, but in my opinion it is still a problem.

I covered up the turban, I covered up the apples.
The problem is the orange is screaming for it's complement which is dull blue, but the green background is very happy and needs it's bright red apples complement. So you have TWO competing complemetary color arrangements in conflict. You need a bright red to complement the dull green background, and you need the orange very bright for your theme which would dictate it's blue complement to be duller. However, a dull blue turban would probably not work well against a dull green background.

OK - there are several comments on the hand/arm there behind the apples. I agree and wish I had this girl to try again, but I dont - so I wont - this will just have to be a learning lesson. Although I will try to make it look better/clearer like has been suggested.

I will soften that line on the back shoulder (our right) - that is bothering me as well now that it has been mentioned.

Sharon - what a great suggestion...Eve's Other Choice...I like it. I will seriously consider changing them thar apples.

Sharon - Now wait just a second. I am not trying to show anyone how wonderful I am. I am trying to learn. But hey - if you say so...ok....Im wonderful.
I dont want to argue about it - your absolutely right - I am terrific!!
No - no - really...you know best and I have to defer to your opinion - I am wonderful! I am SO glad we got that settled! ;)

Thank you Julie, Terri, Allen, Alicia and Sharon - I appreciate it!

Sharon - now you are jsut trying to confuse me by adding more about the color! The background is actually a neutral gray. I noticed on another critique you gave me that you mentioned a certain color and it wasnt really there. I dont know if it is my computer - or yours. What say the rest of you? Does the background look gray or green? It's in reality a cool gray, blue-ish - with a couple of areas (by the orange and to the right of her head as we look at it ) that has a little orange blended in.

Well...
I'd actually thought of it as a blue-gray, maybe a little less saturated and lighter than the bottom of her outfit. Until Sharon called it green, then I went back and looked and it does almost look a little green too.

If I pull it up in Paint Shop Pro and use the color selector to get a sense of the RGB's, it looks like maybe it's more of a very neutral dark blue towards the bottom and less blue towards the top, where R is generally higher than G which is higher than B levels putting most of the top half of the painting (surprisingly!) in a very neutral 'orange' shade, according to the Paint Shop Pro color selector!! The colors are so neutral though that I'd guess the tiniest variation in white balance of your photo could change how they appear?

Terri - I guess...I dont even know enough about photoshop to really follow what you just said! I used fairly neutral gray - no blue in the background, but it still looks cool. The bottom part I added a bit of black and a darker neutral gray. It does appear darker than the original as I keep looking. The hip shape shows more than it does here - I think.

If anyone has ever used John Sanden's portrait colors - the neutral grays are what I used in the background.... I love those pre-mixed grays of his and use them for backgrounds a lot....don't really use the colors for skin though (before anyone gets after me).

Kimberly,

The background does look olive to me. However, if them there apples stay you would need some green as a complementary. Even if you do not have a color corrected version on the web, it would most likely register more harmoniously than it does. A grey blue background would be better, then you could substitute les oranges.

Apparently a lot of posters think you have a lot of ability or they wouldn't be bugging so unmercifully.

I will try to post my study of Alicia Rose soon to show you how stupid, simple, easy and TIME SAVING an itty bitty 12"x16"color study is.

I was happy with Marvin's Paxton portrait colors and found them exceptionally easy to work with.

I do not use premixed colors as I find the background color so influences the whole composition that it has to be well considered and fine tuned. If you photograph during daylight, a set up of the out-fit against your background color in the same light, will give you the best information as to it's tonality.

Kim,

I held my tongue on your earlier post of this painting because I really do admire this painting, but them thar fruits are too close to the edge of the canvas to make me happy. If you had followed Sharon's directions to make a quick study first, you could have avoided this problem by either resizing Eve totally, or (and this is what I would have done) turning this into a square painting. When I do biggish paintings I cut out a big piece of brown paper the same size as the canvas and do a charcoal study to make sure I don't have compositional problems. More agile minds could figure this out in a 5" x 7" scrap of paper but I seem to need the same-size dummy scrap to visualize porportions.

You have a nice brush technique on this painting, nicely done!

Sharon - you mean all this nitpicking is because I am wonderful? ;) This is all good advice - I need to muddle through now what to do.

Linda - you will be pleased to know the hands and fruit are not that close to the edge - I had to crop the jpg since I didnt photograph it straight enough. It's in the studio, but I'd guess there is maybe 2-3 inches from each edge to the hands/fruit. Does that help?

Sharon - I guess I am going to have to start doing color studies or your going to nag me to death. Imagine the time I am going to save YOU from critiquing. What are you going to do with all that extra time?

Love it --- your best yet, by far, in my opinion!

However........The asymmetry of her nose and mouth make her far less attractive than she should be (and probably is) and distracts a lot from the rest of the painting, I think.

Thanks Michele!

About her mouth and nose - well just a bit of her teeth always show - like I have it, but the uneven upper lip - how it droops a bit on our right was a 'happy accident' and I left it because I thought it added character. If it were a commission or straight portrait I wouldnt have done that. She is jus too darned pretty this girl - I thought she looked too unreal. I did try to downplay her nose a bit - it is very round - and I also made her shoulders a bit smaller. She is one of those really tall girls with shoulders like a linebacker. Her hands and feet are huge too - what a very beautiful girl she is though. I found out after she modeled that she used to be in JCPenny catalogs and on Tide commercials when she was younger. She is the best model I have ever had for gracefullness. Those long lanky ones are wonderful!

Hey Kim,

Very nice job, I really like the brush application. This is a critique area, so I will just say her right ear does'nt look like it received the same attention. It could just be my screen.
But......
Yes you are, now if you gain about 20-30 lbs, you'd be perfect! ;)

Jimmie-

Thank you & I will for sure look at that ear again.

Ha! You are a funny guy :o Hey sure - I'd be a hot fatty, but 20-30 more and I'd have to walk sideways through my doorways, get sturdier tires on my car and better shoes....it would just be too costly ;)

My last word on this. Kimberly, I hope you DON"T have a major complex about this picture as it has a great deal to recommend it. Next time, take what you have learned and just post it in the unveilings section.

Sharon - No complex here. I post here when I am open to suggestions. I hope you dont detect any defensiveness - there isnt any at all.

No defensiveness detected! I just can't wait to see what you do when you pull everything together and post something you really love.

A really big dollie.
 

Kimberly et al.,

I just posted my mannequin on the Alicia Rose site. I cannot tell you how useful this setup was in gauging color relationships. My model had left for college and it was invaluable in painting the skirt, the rose and the sash.

The blouse, corset, waist and front of the skirt was painted from the model, but the skirt was painted from the mannequin. It was great to place the drapery where you wanted it and not have it move.

I have done similar mock-ups with paper towels and pillows, but this is easier.

Here is an update on what I have done after these critiques. I wont be posting in the Unveilings since I cannot seem to get a decent photo of it and it ships to a show in the morning. I think I addressed each issue raised, except changing the apples to oranges - I just plain ran out of time. I even put retouch varnish on when my signature was still a bit wet and smudged.

Thank you for all the help folks! Forgive me for the cock-eyed photo. The area above the orange has some kind of cast shadow there in the photo.

Excellent work -- you should be very proud!

Eve's Alternative
 

Excuse me if I reply incorrectly as I am a new member, but I had to respond to your painting. It is everything I like in a painting - great color, brushwork, drawing, composition and a compelling image. It feels like skin and bone surrounded by light.
Very nice.

Michele, thank you :D

John, welcome to the forum - and thank you for your kind words!

Kim-- This is just beautiful. I really like the theme, and especially how you handled the light on her collar bone at the base of the neck, very convincing!

You're building quite a portfolio!

Wow - congratulations on a beautiful, very successful painting, Kim.

Did I miss it - did you tell us the area that was bothering you? Or did anyone get it right?

Kimberly,

She looks great.

Terri, Cindy & Sharon - thank you!

Cindy - I dont want to say now! Actually I think I fixed it. It was the forearm holding the platter. It had light hitting it - so in life it wasnt as dark as I felt it should be since it was on the shadow side. Either I fixed it or just got over it because I didnt notice it the day I shipped it out!