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Old 05-26-2005, 10:53 AM   #1
Carolyn Bannister Carolyn Bannister is offline
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Good/bad composition?




Hi all,

I've just finished a rough charcoal sketch of a friends daughter, my first try at someone younger!

I thought I would run the composition by you first as I seem to be having a bit of trouble with tying backgrounds in.

BTW she isn't making a rude gesture, her hand is actually turned away from us more than it appears here, I will have to watch that
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Last edited by Carolyn Bannister; 05-26-2005 at 11:03 AM.
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Old 05-26-2005, 11:45 AM   #2
Mike McCarty Mike McCarty is offline
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Hello Carolyn,

I enjoy these compositional puzzles. Here is my take, other opinions may follow.

I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with your composition. I would be inclined toward keeping those mullions away from the edge of the canvas on our left. I would also be careful not to crowd the top of her head by moving that dark wall element slightly higher. Depending on the color of her hair you could play around with that dark aspect behind her head.

Regarding the hand -- I think the gesture, whether rude or not, may be a bit distracting. You could probably make slight modifications to it and reduce it from being a key visual element.
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Old 05-27-2005, 06:22 AM   #3
Carolyn Bannister Carolyn Bannister is offline
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Mike,

Thanks for the input, as always very helpful, and i appreciated your comments on 'proud housewife' as well.

It will have to wait for a while now though, off to do a two week tour of Italy tomorrow Must remember to charge my camera battery

Carolyn.
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Old 05-27-2005, 11:22 PM   #4
Michele Rushworth Michele Rushworth is offline
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I agree with Mike, the hand gesture is very distracting. I think a major modification to the hand pose is in order. I would ask her or someone else to pose again in the same lighting and shoot some more hand options.
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